As long as mother doesn't get angry, shouting is doomed to be useless? What to do if the child 'shouts out ten and nine times should not'
Every mother should have had this kind of experience, that is, sometimes when the child is asked to do something, the child will show that kind of indifference, and the parent is like playing the piano to the cow. This kind of incident of parents "speaking to the air" happens almost every day in every family.
The child turned a deaf ear to the mother's yelling for the first two times, and finally responded the third time, but he had no intention of taking any action. It seems that as long as mother doesn't get angry, shouting is doomed to have no effect. So why do children who are usually lively and active seem to be "deaf" at this time? In fact, there are many reasons, but most of them are children who are immersed in their own small world and are particularly focused on doing something. Only a very small number of children deliberately ignore their mothers. No matter which of these two, it is possible that the mothers' calling is wrong.
So what should mothers pay attention to when teaching their children:
- Don't call remotely
After having children, many mothers feel that they have no skills at all. They have to do various housework while taking care of their children. Therefore, many mothers choose to speak remotely when they are busy with work. A mother shared such an experience: It was about 8 o'clock in the evening that day, she was busy putting Erbao to sleep, and Dabao was playing with building blocks in the living room by himself, so she yelled for Dabao to wash up and get ready to rest. After the response, she continued to tell Er Bao a bedtime story. Half an hour later, Erbao had already fallen asleep. She walked out of the living room and found that Dabao was still sitting on the sofa playing tirelessly with his toys. At this moment, she was a little unhappy, so she asked Dabao to hurry up and clean up the toys with a more stern tone. But when she came to the living room at nine o'clock after she finished washing, Dabao was still playing. In this situation, the child seems to have replied to the mother, but in fact he didn't take the mother's words seriously at all, which of course made the mother furious.
It seems that this kind of thing is a child's problem, but it is actually the adults who are doing it wrong. Because when children cannot see their parents, they will not pay much attention to their words, so the next time you encounter such a situation, adults should stop what you are doing, walk over and call the child's name to divert his attention , and then explain the specific things, let the child feel that this matter is very important, and he will naturally pay attention to it.
2. Highlight key points when speaking
A child is still growing up, and his comprehension ability is not as good as that of an adult, so when calling the child to do something, he should highlight the key points, and there should be no other instructions in the words. For example: "Can you hurry up, the homework is so late and you haven't finished it, and it will be late to go to bed after a while, and the teacher will blame you if you can't get up tomorrow and you are late." Change this sentence to simply: "Go and do your homework." It is easier for children to understand. Even if children are required to do multiple things, they should be said one by one separately, because children's brains cannot process too much information at the same time.
3. Don’t push repeatedly
After some parents give instructions to their children, the children don't do it immediately, and the parents can't help but repeat it over and over again. In fact, not only will this not have the effect of urging, but it will make the child feel that the parents' instructions do not need to be completed immediately, and they will talk about it later anyway. Just like some people set several alarms in the morning, after the first alarm rings, they will lie down and continue to sleep with peace of mind, because he knows that there will be several alarms to wake him up later. If the child does not complete it after telling the child once, the correct approach is that the parent should ask the child what he just asked him to do. At this time, the instructions given by the parents just now will appear in the child's mind, and he will know what he should do.
4. Call the child in a different way
Most of the things that parents call their children every day are the same, and most of them are trivial matters such as eating and sleeping. So if you want your child to execute it in time, you need to raise your child's interest. For example, you can change "It's time to eat" to "Come and see what delicious food Mom made for you today". In this way, calling the child with different words every day will greatly improve the enthusiasm of the child.
5. Keeping an eye on the child
This method is very effective, because staring at the child all the time shows that the parents think this matter is very urgent and important, and the child will worry that if he does not execute it, he will anger the parents, so he will quickly execute the parents' instructions. Because this method requires ample time, parents don't have to do it every day. Do this when conditions permit, and the child's executive ability will become higher and higher in the long run.