Mom, stop complaining that dad is a pig teammate. These dads have 'influence' and mom can't replace them

In modern family education, because of the influence of traditional concepts, many people think that the mother should bring the child, and the father only needs to be responsible for making money to support the family.

''After getting married, I have always been raising children''

''His father is often away from home''

In fact, this concept has a lot of drawbacks. The lack of either parent is not good for the health of the child.

The disadvantages of long-term lack of fatherly love

First of all, children who lack parental love for a long time tend to be weaker than children of the same age.

The father is the representative of masculinity in the eyes of children. Generally, when referring to the image of father, words such as ''hero''''' sense of security'''''protection''''manly'' will appear in our minds.

When referring to mother, most of us will think of ''cooking'''''love''''warm'' and other words that are more ''soft''.

When children get along with their father, they will imitate his style of dealing with others, and they will be more rational when considering problems.

There is a child in the class whose father is often away on business trips, so he lives with his mother and sister.

As a result, in the face of difficulties, he did not seem strong enough, and he complained to the teacher in tears at every turn: ''Teacher, my feet are broken. ''''I can't do this question''''They laughed at me''

Furthermore, children who have been away from their fathers for a long time often show a ''weak'' side when dealing with things

If your children often live with their mother, because women are more sensitive emotionally, they will act impatient when they encounter setbacks.

Therefore, children cannot learn better ways to deal with things, and cannot hone their perseverance. Being indecisive when encountering an accident is not conducive to the child's future life after entering the society.

Finally, it is easy to breed a sense of inferiority

Not all children's minds are rock solid, and they also become hurt because of someone else's words, which makes them feel inferior.

When others rhetoric about their father, when they know nothing about their father, it is a kind of psychological and spiritual harm to the child.

''Where's your father? ''''Did your father not want you anymore? ''

When faced with these problems, the child will choose to fight back at first: ''I have a father, he is just busy''''My father is making money, he is working''''My father will not want me' '

Later, the child will feel that this refutation is pale and weak, and will gradually stop arguing with others.

The role of fathers in children's education

Improve children's intelligence

Studies have shown that when children are 7 to 12 years old, children who often have their father accompany them to play have faster intellectual development.

Although the father will appear impatient when he encounters some problems, so he will directly throw the problem to the child to solve it by himself.

This approach looks rough, but it is actually more conducive to children to develop a good habit of thinking independently.

When the child encounters a problem, the mother will help the child or even solve the problem for the child, which will prevent the child from learning new skills.

Xiao Ming is a six-year-old child, but he still hasn't learned to go to the toilet by himself. Because every time he went to the toilet, his mother would wipe his ass, flush and let him wash his hands.

Until one day, his mother went out and only his father was at home. After he went to the toilet, he wanted his father to wipe his butt for him, but was refused.

''You are already six years old, and you can handle your own affairs by yourself. ''

''But none of these mothers taught me. ''

''That's your business, no you just stand there. ''

Out of desperation, Xiao Ming had no choice but to recall what his mother had done in the past, and learned to use the toilet by himself.

Many people think that this is because the father is lazy, but if it is not because the father is ''lazy'', how can children learn new skills so quickly?

Better shape children's character and behavior

As mentioned earlier, the image of a father is a representative of masculinity and manhood. Boys will imitate their fathers when they get along with their fathers, such as their father's style of doing things, some of their father's behaviors and methods of handling things; while girls are in When you get along with your father, learn how to contact and interact with the opposite sex, and establish a sense of gender.

When many children get along with other people, they will automatically ''stand in line'', such as ''I am a boy, I must be strong''''I am a girl, I want to wear a skirt''''You are a man , you're going to the men's toilet''

Develop good habits in children

After spending a long time with the father, the child will develop a calm character of 'not in a hurry and not impatient', and treat the problems he faces rationally.

When encountering difficulties, emotional people will think ''Why did I encounter this kind of thing again? ''''I think I can't do it well'', and a rational person will think''There are only three ways to encounter this kind of thing''''What can I do to better solve this problem?''

How fathers can teach their children more effectively

First, face up to your own shortcomings

Parents should learn to face up to their own deficiencies while educating their children and improve their educational methods in a timely manner.

When many parents encounter their child's personality problems, they will feel that it is already like this anyway, and they will leave him alone.

''This is not a problem of me alone'' This kind of concept has a very bad influence on the child and is not conducive to the child's health.

Only by learning to face up to your own shortcomings, improve in time, and make progress together with your children, can you find the right direction in educating children.

Second, and also a very important point, fathers should spend more time with their children

In family education, the existence of parents is like a balance for children's education, and it is not good to favor either side. Lack of parental or maternal love for a long time is detrimental to the growth of children.

Many times, the father earns money to support the family, and the mother is responsible for educating and taking care of the children, but neglecting this, no one can do anything without it.

I remember that when I encountered difficulties in the past, if I responded to my mother's questions, the answer I got the most was ''I don't know this very well, you go and ask your father. ''

If I ask my dad, sometimes he will give me some advice, and he will also ask his own thoughts: ''These are just for reference, mainly what do you think about yourself. ''

Third, don't speak ill of the other party in front of your child

When you have a problem with the other party's actions or words, don't blame the other party in front of your children. Although you will feel relieved, in the eyes of children, their parents have many shortcomings, and they will quarrel because of these.

For example, saying in front of a child, "What a mother and a spoiled child."

''A man like you is really too weak''''Are you still a man? ''

Thus left in the child's heart "'My father is useless''''My mother is too strong'', thus causing trouble for the child's future life, such as ''big man'''''little woman'' ', all because of improper family education.

There is a male colleague in the company who has gone on a blind date for many times without finding a suitable marriage partner. He often dislikes the blind date ''not gentle enough''''not enough to take care of the family''''after I can't get married, I quit my job and take care of my children at home''

But in fact, it was also because of his own machismo that he failed the blind date.

If you are still complaining that your husband is a ''pig teammate'' and think your husband is useless, then please read this article carefully. The influence of a father cannot be replaced by a mother. If you want your children to be able to make a difference in all aspects of encountering and thinking about problems, then fathers are essential to their children's education.