Children 'fake cry', parents 'ignore'? Your 'ignorance' will only ruin the child

Xia Xia said some time ago that her child has been crying constantly recently, and people are guarding her. Moreover, when the child is awake, when it is almost impossible for him to stay by himself for a while, as soon as Xia Xia leaves the child's sight for a while, the child will cry loudly, and he will always feel at ease when he sees her.

Xia Xia said: ''But the strange thing is that every time only someone hugs or guards the child, the child stops crying immediately, and occasionally plays with adults. It's just to get our attention. Why do you think children are so smart these days? ''

Although sometimes children cry and make parents very tired and irritable, if parents always have the problem of fake crying, parents should be thankful, because children are very smart and know how to attract everyone's attention. Growing up is also a problem Well-behaved child.

There are reasons behind the fake crying of children. Parents need to understand more and meet the needs of their children, so as to avoid affecting their physical and mental health. It is not a scientific approach to ignore the crying of children all the time. Don't let your ignorance ruin your children. Parents should pay attention to learning and understand relevant knowledge while educating their children. Science should be the crying of children.

I believe that many parents have encountered the same situation as Xia Xia. Children always like to cry to attract the attention of adults. Although it is very noisy, the hidden behind the children's fake crying is the child's high skills. Parents need more Serve on dim sum.

Children always like ''fake cry''? This is a good thing!

The research of Japanese scholar Hiroko Nakayama pointed out that children who like ''fake crying'' may be wiser in the future. Let's take a closer look at the study:

It mainly observes children's crying habits closely through influence records, and analyzes the emotional changes and influence of children before and after each cry. The results show that most children's crying is caused by negative emotions. In a few cases, crying is a Because of positive emotions. Some still seem to get family attention by crying intentionally, and the child will stop crying when the parent approaches or hugs the child.

Other studies have also shown that children's "fake crying" can promote children's self-expression ability, is conducive to the development and expression of children's emotions, make the parent-child relationship closer, and is also very helpful for children's interpersonal skills.

Why do babies cry? In fact, there are reasons for these, and parents need to understand.

The development of the child's self-awareness.

Parents should know by now that the child’s fake cry is to divert everyone’s attention to himself. It may seem self-willed, but it also reflects a problem from the side: the child begins to develop self-awareness and self-centered thinking. way, which is a sign of a child's growth.

Children want to ''get attention''.

Parents are more careful to observe the child's crying, and you will find that the child is also skilled. For example, when the child is crying, it will stop properly in the middle, stop to see if the family responds, and then decide what to do next , really premeditated behavior ah!

This shows that children not only express their emotions through fake crying, but also know how to identify which way of expression can attract everyone's attention and constantly adjust their behavior (it's really a pit).

But we should admit that through fake crying, children can communicate well with their parents, and the interaction between parents and children is very helpful for children's social skills and emotional expression when they grow up.

Children are exploring the unknown world.

Don't think that crying is a simple action. This is also a child's exploration of ''crying''. Children are also curious about what ''crying'' is. Sometimes, children think that ''crying'' is a game, so children always play with their parents in the form of fake crying. In fact, these are children's exploration and experience of the outside world, and children are constantly growing. process.

''Ignore it'' is the right thing to do?

Parents are always helpless when it comes to the crying of their children. It is not okay to hug or not to hug. Some people say that it is not necessary to let the children cry. When they are tired from crying, they will naturally stop crying. The older generation always thinks that hugging the child as soon as the child cries will form a habit, so that the child will learn to harass the parent by crying and crying, and can't do anything.

However, some parents just can't help it and go to coax their children when they hear their crying. In fact, these are extreme practices. Simply ignoring them or reacting all at once is inappropriate. Let’s talk about them in detail.

Ignoring it will develop a ''conditioned reflex'' behavior for the child. That is, fake crying can't attract adults, and you can't get hugs, and it's useless to cry. After a few simple cycles like this, the child will naturally learn to behave, and will no longer fake crying, which is the famous ''crying immunity method''. To deal with crying children, the effect of this trick is remarkable, it can be effective in a short time, and it has become a parenting treasure for many parents.

However, such an approach will actually have a greater negative effect, and in severe cases it will affect the child's life. Relevant data surveys show that children raised in such extreme ways are not successful in their lives. Some children develop personality defects as adults, such as autism, schizophrenia, and even suicidal tendencies.

Although this method can make the child become well-behaved, it actually kills the child's ability to express emotions and trust in the parents. The child becomes laughing and reluctant to talk, like a doll without emotions, even if he encounters problems or problems. Injured, they also do not express their inner emotions or seek parental help.

For the child's ''fake cry'', don't let "ignorance" hurt the child

Ignoring the child is to nurse the child's emotional needs, so that the child does not feel warm, makes the child indifferent, does not know how to express emotions, affects the child's character and interpersonal skills, and even affects the child's physical and mental health. For children's fake crying, scientific treatment is still the right way.

Identify the reasons behind your child's crying.

Crying is a way for children to express. Sometimes children cry to express their uncomfortable, fearful or uneasy emotions. It is not just to attract parents' attention, find out the reason for the child's crying, and help the child solve the problem. Crying behavior is not always present.

Slowly downplay the child's ''unreasonable crying''.

When the child's fake cry is just to get something, parents need to keep their bottom line, don't always let the child's temperament, know how to reject or ignore the child's unreasonable demands, and don't see it at all. This can gradually dilute the child's utilitarian consciousness.

If parents always pay too much attention to their children's behavior, they will foster this bad behavior habit of their children if they are not careful. Therefore, parents should guide their children slowly, so that children understand that such methods are incorrect and ineffective, and children can correct such bad habits.

Parents should give more care and love to their children.

The child's fake cry is essentially to attract everyone's attention, indicating that parents usually care too little for the child, and the child's needs for love and hugs are not met, so the child will use this method to attract attention. If the child receives sufficient care and security, then this method will lose its meaning, and the child will naturally not behave in this way.

Children's feelings about the world are all through their parents. Whatever you give to children, they will feel what they will and will learn what they will naturally learn. When a child is frightened, he expresses it by crying, and if the parent goes over to pat or hug the child, he will calm down when he feels safe. When a child feels lonely, he can also express it by crying. If you go to comfort him and accompany him for a while, he will feel that the world is warm.