After telling the truth many times, coercion and temptation, the child still bites, where is the problem?

Various "bad habits" of children often make parents distressed, such as robbing children's toys, tearing paper, throwing things, fetishes and so on.

In addition, the more complaints I received were that "children like to bite people", whether at home or outside, they bite things when they pick them up. At the same time, they also bite their parents and children who play with them.

This not only affects the baby's own health, but also brings certain harm to the person who is bitten.

The child of a friend's family is a very obedient type, but she also likes to bite, and her friend's head is big.

A friend said that they played with a child in the park before. At first, they both played well, but then because the child reached out and touched his daughter's toy, she bit the child directly. It was a cry . cry.

The friend hurriedly apologized to the other child, and even yelled at his daughter twice, making him very embarrassed, and feeling angry and helpless in his heart. Because of this biting behavior, she said that the child was beaten and scolded countless times, but it was useless.

Many parents have had this embarrassing experience, and they racked their brains for this. Every time they beat their children, the children would cry and cry, and they felt powerless every time they scolded their children.

Why can't the child get rid of the biting problem after the parents have told the truth many times, coercion and temptation? Why is it so stubborn? Where is the problem?

01What is the purpose of the child biting?

In fact, parents should find the root cause of their child's biting , not just stay on the surface of the behavior, and prescribe the right medicine to really have an effect.

1) Entering the sensitive period of the oral cavity

This is a necessary stage in the baby's development process. At this time, the child needs to understand the world through hands and mouth.

Although the baby is young, there is still a reason for doing things. Parents must not talk about problems out of psychological motivation.

• Babies of 2-3 months are when their lips feel the most obvious. Biting is their physiological need and a way to explore the world.
• When the baby is 4-7 months old, the first baby tooth will grow. We should all experience the feeling of teething. There will be a sore and itchy feeling around the gums. If you want to bite something to suppress, some babies will even bite while feeding. Mother. But in fact, depending on the age group, the child does not recognize that his behavior is incorrect.
• From 8 to 14 months, your baby will bite when his emotions are particularly obvious, such as being very excited or very angry.
• Children after the age of 1 have a strong desire to communicate with people, but due to their weak language skills, they cannot communicate through speech, and they are anxious to express themselves. Therefore, when playing with other children, they may bite people. Get the other person's attention.

2) Pure imitation behavior

Children are a group with very strong imitation ability. I believe many parents have noticed that their children have inadvertently made actions that they have done before.

The same is true of biting people. We usually take children downstairs to play. There are many children of similar age there. When they bite people and are seen by children, they will slowly "assimilate".

This is just a simple imitation of the child, and he has not yet realized whether it is correct or not.

3) Express your emotions

Although children don't have complex emotions like adults, they can also have very sad and angry moments. For example, if you make a mistake, you are beaten and scolded, etc., you will feel wronged and sad.

However, the baby's language ability is limited and can only be expressed through body movements. Biting is also one of the ways for them to vent their emotions.

A friend called last weekend to say that the child had been playing with toys, and called several times to eat at lunch time, but she still insisted. When she got angry, she cleaned it up and accidentally knocked down the building block house that the child had built for a long time. I cried a lot and bit her.

Not to mention children, even if someone touches something we love, we will get angry and vent our emotions, just like children.

02What should parents do when their child bites?

When some parents encounter their children biting other children, they will say, "Now the children are still young, they don't mean it, it's fine when they grow up." If it was your child who was bitten, would you still say the same?

There are also some parents who did react to their children's behavior. In order to keep their children's memory, it can be described as beating or scolding.

But these two methods are not correct. Letting go will make the child think that he is right, and overreacting may strengthen the child's psychology.

It should be noticed by parents that if a young baby bites, even if he is not aware of his mistakes, he should be given correct guidance.

Here are specific practices recommended for parents:

1) Let the child understand the feeling of being bitten

Many babies bite because of oral discomfort or behavioral imitation, but biting is a bad habit anyway, and the child does not realize it.

We can indirectly express the feeling of being bitten to the baby, let him know that biting is wrong.

For example, when we took the baby to play downstairs and saw a similar scene, we could tell him: "Look at how painful the bitten child is, crying so hard, you are a good baby, you can't bite, otherwise No child wants to play with you anymore."

When we read picture books to babies, we can also buy some related topics, and let the children understand that biting is wrong by telling stories. This method not only enhances the parent-child relationship, but also makes it easier for the baby to understand and accept.

2) Buy teething food and toys

If it is determined that the child is biting because he is in the sensitive period of the oral cavity, you can buy some teething food or toys to transfer the "injury".

There are many kinds of teeth grinding toys on the market. We should choose carefully, take the principle of safety and reliability as the principle, and disinfect them frequently after taking them home. Such toys will be cleaner and safer than children's biting.

In addition, you can also let the child eat some food such as molar biscuits to improve oral discomfort, and the child's needs are met, and naturally they will not bite again.

If parents prevent their baby's teeth grinding during the sensitive period, this need may be delayed until two to four years old , and it will become more and more serious with age, which is not good for growth.

The phenomenon mentioned above is what psychology calls "overcompensation".

3) Correct behavior guidance

Parents are children's first teachers, and those who spend a long time with their children are also the objects that children like to imitate the most. If parents can give their children correct behavioral guidance, many bad habits may be reduced.

If the child bites because he is too excited, we can tell him: if he is very happy, we can express it by jumping and cheering. If the bite hurts the other person, then everyone will be unhappy and destroy the atmosphere.

If the child is angry and biting because another child took the toy he likes, we can tell him: you can say "no" to things you don't like, or exchange toys with him, express ideas in other ways, bite People are wrong.

4) Instill in the child in advance

When the child is young, the parent is the authority and our advice is most easily accepted.

In addition, we can start by stopping him from biting his parents. If he is bitten at home, don't ignore the behavior because he is playing with you, express dissatisfaction with fake crying or painful expressions , and tell him that he is very happy to do so. Pain is very sad.

A child's favorite person is his parents, and by doing so, he will notice that his behavior is wrong.

In fact, if you want to raise an excellent and high emotional intelligence child, in addition to beating, scolding and losing your temper, wise parents should learn to use skills.

Second-born mothers and nutritionists share their experiences in parenting life for everyone; the pictures are all from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact me to delete them; in addition, the code words are not easy, if there are individual typos, please don't mind~