When was it discovered that a child was cheating for the first time? Parents who do these three points in time can affect their children's life!
Cheating is rarely mentioned in our daily life, but according to surveys and studies, 60% of primary and secondary school students have cheated in exams, and even more than 90% of students admit that they have plagiarized other people's homework. The survey data also shows that 34% of parents never talk about cheating with their children. It is not difficult to find that ''cheating'' has been lurking in children's learning and life, but many parents never noticed it.
Because many children do not have a very thorough understanding of ''cheating'', some children even think that '''cheating'' is helping each other. The correct answer of the test paper was copied to the same desk''. The child does not know that copying the answer in the exam is ''cheating''. Copying the answer to the classmates violates the rules of the examination. It is also regarded as ''cheating''. It's all because children don't have enough awareness of ''cheating''.
1. The child's first ''cheating'' is often a cognitive problem
The famous former Soviet educator Luna Charlesski said: ''Making mistakes is the tuition fee that must be paid for progress''. Everyone will have the first time, the first time to make a mistake, the first time to fail the exam, the first time to take the first place in the test, the first time to ''cheate'', when the child has the first ''cheating'', Have your parents thought about anything? Is it the child's own problem, or the parent's lack of thorough education on this aspect of the child? In fact, the child's first ''cheating'' has the following reasons:
- Moral cognition
The child is at an ignorant age, and he does not know the dangers of ''cheating'', nor does he know that ''cheating'' is a wrong approach. The child's awareness of ''cheating'' is not enough. Parents did not instill in their children the idea of "cheating" in a timely manner, resulting in the child's thinking that "cheating" is nothing, and the child's awareness of "cheating" is not clear enough, thus making this mistake .
- Behavioural cognition
Also, it is wrong for the child to not know that he is ''cheating'', maybe he thinks ''cheating'' is fun, no brainer. It's cool to copy the answer directly. Maybe he thinks ''cheating'' can help others, but he hasn't understood the ''punishment'' after ''cheating'', ''cheating'', what price does he have to pay? In terms of behavior, the child's restraint is not enough, and he cannot control himself well. As long as there is a peer instigating, the child will cheat ''unconsciously''.
- Parental indulgence
Many parents have this mentality:
Cheating isn't a big deal, right? Who hasn't cheated?
I have seen the child cheating for a long time. To take into account the child's self-esteem, can't you just turn a blind eye?
Cheating is cheating, and it won't work if you look at it.
Parental indulgence can lead children to the brink of self-harm. Cheating is cheating, and it also has a negative impact on learning. This is very important, and most parents do not realize this problem.
2. Cheating is a Human Trend
Has cheating become the norm? In a survey conducted by Kessler International in the United States on ''student cheating'', the results showed that: 86% of students claimed that they cheated in school, and 54% of students believed that cheating was OK Accepted, it is necessary to remain competitive, with only 12% of students saying they would never cheat. And more students will have such a mentality: as long as they are not caught, they will be fine, and even if they are caught, the punishment is too light. Cheating has obviously become a trend. Most students love to cheat, usually For the following points:
- Children's ''comparison'' psychology
Many children do not consciously cheat. They see others copying answers more often. When they see that someone in the class is much better than them in academic performance, this kind of ''comparison'' mentality prompts the child, I can too. , I am stronger than them, and the child will do everything possible to borrow me from your homework and borrow me to copy your test paper.
- Fulfill your parents’ expectations of you
Parents put too much emphasis on grades. Every time their child takes an exam, parents pay special attention, especially when their child scores relatively high, parents are even more happy and happy. Children want to meet their parents’ expectations for themselves, and Do not want to let their parents down on themselves, so the child can only ''cheating''.
- Satisfy your self-esteem
It feels good to be praised, appreciated, and praised. When a child's cheating score is praised by his parents, the child will be more ''arrogant'' and want to continue to win his self-esteem in this way.
Educators have said, ''Everyone makes mistakes. But only a fool will be obsessed''!
Just like in 2018, a senior student at a university in Shanghai cheated in three consecutive exams and scolded the teacher. For this reason, the result given by the school was that he was expelled from the school, which is equivalent to his four years in college. It was all read in vain. He was particularly dissatisfied with the school’s practice and took the school to court. In September 2019, the court found the fact that he cheated, and also recognized the legality of the school’s expulsion process. behavior, and finally, the court rejected Xiao Wang's claim.
After getting this news, netizens also said that he was responsible for his cheating behavior.
If I had known this earlier, why was it in the first place? If I could have known the dangers of cheating early on, then Xiao Wang would not have caused this tragedy. Preventing problems before they happen is always more important than making amends.
3. Child cheating is a critical period of ''counseling'', and doing these three points is the key
Parents must pay enough attention to children's "cheating". I have read a word from a professor at a foreign university before, that cheating can be done in learning, but what about those who fly? If his skills were obtained by cheating, the lives of everyone on the entire plane would be lost. Parents should educate their children about ''cheating'' from a young age. Doing these three points is the key!
- Help children more fully recognize the disadvantages of cheating
Smart parents will give priority to protecting their children's self-esteem, helping children realize the drawbacks of cheating, and let children understand that cheating is a bad behavior, cheating in exams is always 0 points, cheating will also affect academic performance, etc. , the attitude of parents is very important, if parents always face their children with an aggressive attitude: ''Look at yourself, if you don't study hard, you will know cheating, if you don't know if it's shameful, you will lose all my face Now, don't call me mom, I don't have a cheating son''! If in this case, the child can only bow his head silently by your questioning and aggressive scolding. And if you switch to another way: ''Child, have you been under too much pressure from studying recently? Haven't reviewed yet? Or do you have no confidence in yourself? ''If it was you, which way would you prefer? The second kind of caring concern and inquiry will make people more receptive.
- Help children understand that knowledge depends on their own efforts, and let them understand the value of hard work
Cheating is just a peek at other people's knowledge points, not their own. Parents should let their children understand: ''The best exam depends on your own strength. If everyone cheats, the world will be in chaos. Yes, we can ask questions, it's nothing to be upright, teachers like children who ask questions the most". Let the children understand in simple and easy-to-understand words, rely on their own strength, their own efforts are the best achievements! It doesn't matter if the score is not high, as long as you work hard next time, but don't cheat.
- Cultivate children's honest quality, quality is more important than grades
I have seen such a fable before: There was a poor woodcutter who lived by chopping wood. He got up early every day and worked hard every day. He lived a very hard life. One day, the poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe. He entered a big river. At this time, God appeared. The first time he fetched a ''silver axe'' for him, he said it was not his, and the second time he fetched a ''gold axe'' for him, the farmer He said again that it wasn't his, and for the third time he caught an ''iron axe'', and the farmer said happily, ''This is mine''! God said, I think you are an honest person, and I gave you the other two axes. From then on, the farmer lived a happy life. What this fable tells us is to be honest, and honesty is a good quality. Parents must be good role models in order to cultivate this good quality permanently and let this good quality accompany the growth of children.
Fourth, review the child's ''cheating mentality'' and solve the worries
It is said that if there is a first time, there will be a second time. Parents should plan ahead, understand their children's ''cheating psychology'', and ''do it'' before their children, so as to prevent their children from ''cheating'' and their children'' cheating again. '', parents can analyze from two aspects. On the one hand, it comes from the parents, the child is afraid of living up to the parents' expectations, and on the other hand, it comes from themselves, they have no confidence in themselves, and they are afraid that they will not do well in the exam, and their ranking will be compared. Start from these two aspects, strengthen the child's confidence, don't put too much pressure on the child, let the child play at a normal level, cut off the child's "cheating mentality" from the source, and solve the worries.
A person should be honest, parents should clearly guide their children, and it is more important to have the quality of honesty and integrity.